My Dream Girl Pt. 3
“A rose is still a rose even if call by another name.” Shakespeare
Green. Green like the Amazon, green like Martle Beach, green like the Florida keys. But this spot isn’t as while known as those locations. Nestled in the north east corner of Wisconsin, School House Beach is a natural beauty that looks like it was decorated by the hand of God. From in aerial view the tall, noble, luscious trees look like over grown rich grass. And the green sea looks like it is orchestrated to match the foliage on the beach. Beginning at the shore, the beaches water is a light transparent green, becoming darker shades of green deeper into shore. In all my years of travel, I never saw anything like this and the stones. Stones lay underneath the shore stretching out onto land taking the place where sand is usually located.
These stones are smooth, ironically so smooth they feel soft and soothing to the skin. Similar to the stones that decorates spa’s or that the masseuse actually uses when doing back massages. Claude Monet, George O’Keeffe, the best landscape artists wouldn’t have done justice to this scene. The only thing more beautiful then School House Beach is Rose.
She’s dressed casually. Comfortable Nike shoes, blue jeans that grips and hugs her ass and thighs and a Nike tee shirt. Her blond hair is pressed which brings attention to her, soft, clear, and attractive face while also bringing attention to her striking yet subtle blue eyes. Some people would call Rose average. I wouldn’t. I would describe her as down to earth yet extraordinary alluring. She reminds me of the Mona Lisa. Her beauty escapes Hollywood, yet has a place in the heart of mankind.
As we walk on the rocks she ask me what I’m thinking about. “I’m thinking about you. About your lips, about your curves, about your body and how it would feel to touch, told, kiss, be intimate with you. Like how do I get you out of my head and into my bed.”
“Aren’t you being honest.”
“Why not? Most likely you’ve thought, and fantasized about me too.”
“So what if I had? The difference between men and women is that we know how to fantasize without touching. Men can’t control their impulses and have to fulfill that urge even when a minute of pleasure can cause a life time of pain.”
“Do you know the difference between a dog and a cat?.”
I continue before she could answer.
“The difference between a dog and a cat is simple. Dogs go shit in the open. Cats hide their shit. Burry it beneath cat litter.”
“So what are you saying.”
“Having a high sexuality is gender neutral. It’s human to have urges. It’s human to want to fuck who we think is attractive. Woman feel and feed this urge too. They are just smarter in their approach. Like the cat, they hide their shit. So nobody steps in it.”
“That’s an interesting way of putting it.”
“Don’t confuse my openness with you as my agenda for us. Honestly I would love to have sex with you but moments like this is what creates intimacy, memories, and an everlasting bond. Sex is important but if intimacy is absent sex is just an activity that any two people can share.”
“So what’s your agenda with me?”
“Sex. Hot, sweaty, sex.”
We both giggle.
“My agenda is too get to know you beyond the surface. To have a piece of you that nobody else have. I don’t care what label we use. I don’t have the desire for labels, more so an understanding. An understanding between two people is important and as long as we understand what we share is the only thing that’s important to me.”
“What can we share beside casual greetings, and friendly flirting. Reality keeps us apart. Your dreams keeps us alive, but life keeps us apart. I have two kids both under five, I’m married, and my job is at odds with us ever being a couple. We may share similar thoughts of entertaining each other but as adults we both know that those thoughts could never become reality. And I think you know this, but you enjoy the chase. Sometimes I think you are in love with the chase, not me.”
As she talks, truth about our reality, about my personality, about the competition of the chase, all resonate with me. In the past, I once thought I loved this one woman and allowed myself to get caught up in the chase. Pride, ego, competition all wore a romantic mask and allowed me to pursue my ex until I got her, but once I had her I didn’t want her. It was the chase, not the woman I was motivated by. Hurting her and myself at the end.
I considered how much of this was true and how much power I was also giving my past. Like I don’t want that one bad experience to show it’s face in my present relationship. Neither do I want to measure my intentions and motives based off my past. Forgiving myself for my past is a process. A process I’m still undergoing and I know this due to my past still having a role in how I interpret and process my present relationships. I have to let go, but I find that easier said then done.
“Maybe what you are saying have some truth to it. But love is a chance right. Trusting someone, making ourselves vulnerable, not giving in to our doubts is a risk that’s required when bonding beyond the surface is involved. It’s one I’m willing to take. And hopefully you are willing to take that risk to.”
“We’ll see. As of right now, I’m still getting a feel for you.”
“And what is the feel?”
“You will find out sooner then later. Can you wait?”
“I’ve waited this long. I could wait a lifetime for you Rose.”
“We’ll see.”
“Shit hopefully, we won’t see if I can wait a lifetime.”
“You know what I mean.”
“Yeah I know what you mean. You sure you want to keep me waiting.”
“It’s not me keeping you waiting Joe. It’s life. I have to deal with some shit in my personal life first. Right now there is no room for what you are asking for. This has nothing to do with my feelings for you and have all to do with reality.”
We continue to walk. I look into the distance and notice the sun shimmering off the waters. And the white clouds looking like cotton candy. All the while knowing that magic is being created between us. Like nature, there will be storms, rainy days and fog but after the storms we will still remain standing, after the rainy days the rainbow will shine, and beyond the fog clarity exist.
“Patience is a virtue being anxious just might hurt you.” I say out the blue.
Surprised by my utterance, Rose ask me what did I say.
“Patience right. Patience is the key ingredient to our process. Patience is a virtue being anxious just might hurt you. Is something I once heard a wise man say.”
“And who was that wise man?”
“Andre 3000 from Outcast.”
She laughs at the source of that quote. Bringing a smile to me as I awake.
Thank you for taking the time to read,
Heru
